To be a mother

I love my little baby. And I find joy in being his mother everyday. 

But every now and then I have a moment where I truly feel like I'm a mother. 

My poor little baby had a rough night. He just could not sleep and he was a little bit on the moody side. 

After trying and failing to get him to go back to sleep I decided to take him out into the family room. 

I laid on the floor and watched as J had the time of his life with a box full of goodies he found. He'd play and then lay his head on me, sometimes he'd lay on me and just chat and every now and then he'd give me some kisses. 

And even though I was exhausted and was more asleep  than awake for the first hour I found that I really enjoyed my early morning play date. As I watched my little man, who got no sleep, enjoying life I felt such a surge of love for him and the gift of being his mom. 

I'm so grateful for him, for his contagious smile, and his easy demeanor. 

Being a mom means you take the good and the rough (I'm hesitant to say bad). It means you get to be the one to comfort the baby in the middle of the night, because you're the one he cries for. You're the one he reaches for. It means that even when you're sick or tired your baby still needs you and you still need them. It means being exhausted but loving the extra snuggles you get in the middle of the night when you feed him, because he no longer sleeps on you in the day. It means giving all you got and receiving so much more. 

I'm so grateful to be a mom. And I love all of my rough times as well as my good times. 

Now don't go thinking I'm totally crazy, as soon as 8 rolled this morning around I had Woody take a turn while I went back to sleep. ;)

How does she do it?

I miss my summer life. Like really. I. Miss. It. 

I was seriously struggling. I was stressed all the time. I felt like I was not being a good teacher, not a good wife, not a good mom. You know how it goes. 

Basically I needed to put more time into EVERYTHING. And I had no time for anything. 

Cooking dinner? Sure I planned dinners and then..... Got take out

Work out? Hm... How about Saturdays ok every other Saturday. Wait what's Saturday?

See my baby? Definitely. I played with J every second he was awake and at home. But that was like 3 hours maybe 4. And I just felt a serious ache for all the time that I was missing. 

Plus playing with my baby meant no chores, no working out, no dinner, no school work. Maybe a shower, MAYBE.... SOMETIMES

AND it is my first time with a serious church calling. And by serious I mean time consuming. All callings are of course serious

I was frustrated. A lot. And I complained and whined a little. Ok ok a lot. 

Something needed to change because I had to work. No way around it. 

I know some people can do it all. Have multiple kids, work full time, work out, have a clean house, make dinner.... But I was finding out that this was not my talent. 

I tried some things. Like asking woody to help, not making dinner (obviously) and just trying to cut back. But I still was struggling. 

Finally I realized the one thing that I had taken out and that I should not have. My scripture study. 

I started listening to conference talks on the way to work. It was a perfect solution for me. 

I have felt such a change in my life since I invited The Lord back into it. I am still stressed and I still don't have enough time but I'm happy. I'm able to enjoy my life way more. And to be PERFECTLY HONEST because I am less stressed, I feel that I a more efficient with my time and am able to get more done. 

When life gets busy it's so easy to cut out your personal scripture time -  it seems to be the first thing that goes. But it's the thing that we need the most. 

So spend some time with The Lord and He will help you accomplish all. 

Don't forget to smile :)

6 Months Old AKA 0 years

My baby turned 6 months old last week!!

WHHHAAATT????!!!

I could hardly believe it.. so I checked, I counted the months on a calendar, on my fingers, called and asked the doctor, and sadly it is true! He really is 6 MONTHS OLD

He is such a great baby. He smiles lots, babbles lots, and eats his toes lots.

Brighton tried to get J to smile.  J really loves Brighton and usually smiles for him, but he always knows when a camera is on, and he always makes me work for his smiles. 

After 6 months of life J is turning into a little man.  He is very interested in everything.  He is constantly looking around and easily distracted, especially while nursing

J is very interested in eating. He opens his mouth whenever I am eating and wants to take a bite! He really enjoys his rice cereal and baby food for like 10 bites.  Then he is bored and is ready to do something else... 

He has recently decided that blowing raspberries while eating is the best idea ever! This makes for some colorful raspberries!

He is an outside baby and loves sitting outside, walking, swimming, anything!

He has a new habit of smiling with his tongue out, he loves it.

I've recently decided that J has the perfect hat head, plus he doesn't have any hair so that's 

the only reason we will welcome the cold weather, beanies.

Even though it has been such a short amount of time, my little J baby has changed so much.  I have loved every stage so far and am loving that he now interacts more with me and his surroundings. 

Basically he's best the baby ever. 

And I feel bad for everyone else because he's not theirs.