Wednesday, October 29, 2014

Free At last

** WARNING ***
 this post is about breastfeeding..... read at your own risk ;)

Well ladies and gentleman... the time has come and my little man is on FORMULA 

dun dun dun

GASP! Foooorrrmmmuulllaaa???

Hahah oh breastfeeding... everyone has so many strong, opinionated, different views.

In the beginning I told Woody 6 months breast feeding and that's it! Because I totally understood how formula is expensive and that it's good for your baby to get the mommy milk BUT I'm going to be totally honest....

I thought breastfeeding was weird. 

I didn't like the idea of it. I didn't like that it would always be me, or having to worry about feeding in public, or I just didn't think I'd like it.

But the little man came and we had some serious ups and downs with the breastfeeding business.  I was lucky that he did not have any real issues with it. I had plenty of milk. And it was not as bad as all the horror stories say it is.

Over the summer, J and I got to be PRO at feeding in public.  Seriously, I just didn't care anymore.... especially since I went to the beach and basically every time I fed him it was in public. So we got over that real quick.

I decided that breastfeeding was AWESOME. It was super easy, and quick. And I didn't have to worry about packing milk or anything. 

Then I went back to work and I could only pump once a day.... Things got tuff real fast. My boobs hurt, my milk got low J hated eating in public (because we stopped practicing) I hated pumping, we had to eat right after day care which never worked with his schedule (but I was always full)  

And the list goes ON.....

Because my milk was so low J had to eat half and half. And he didn't like eating straight formula so it got to the point that I had to pump so I could mix it with formula (while I'm home!) and then feed him....

So think how awesome it was to eat out and about, I had to bring Breast milk and formula and worry about thawing Breast milk, how full I would get etc. 

It was awful

So I decided I was done (judge me if you want, whatever!) 

And we slowly made the switch to formula. (Which stopping nursing was so painful like SO painful). But now I'm done

Cue hallilujah music

Well mostly done (I still leak at times). And truth be told I love it! I love being able to snuggle j while he eats. I love not worrying about how full I am or my lack of milk. I love not having to pump, or thaw Breast milk. 

basically good decision!

Breast feeding. Surprisingly I enjoyed it. 

Formula. I enjoy it!

You can't go wrong! Whatever works for you and your babe!

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

The whispers of my heart

Dearest J

I love you more than I ever knew was possible. Every time I look at you my heart swells. It swells with love for every exaggerated face you make, for how easily you put a smile on every face, for your excited flapping arms and your anxiety to move. You fell asleep in my arms tonight and I realized it had been months since this has happened. Oh how you have grown!! You are such a little man now. I love these precious moments with you as you are now. Your joy and excitement about everything in life reminds me of how life is meant to be lived. I try to soak up all our moments together and lock them into my memory as best I can. But at the same time as I look at your little boy face, and I am excited for you to grow. I am excited for all of the milestones we have ahead of us and am excited to be by your side as you go through all of them. No matter how big you get you will always be my little boy. 

I'll love you forever. I'll like you for always. As long as I'm living my baby you'll be.